GIVE IT AWAY GIVE IT AWAY GIVE IT AWAY GIVEAWAY
All too often, blog giveaways strike me as…I don’t know, materialistic?
I mean, I understand what is going on: you get a product, you sample it, you spread the joy. Cool. That I can get behind! I even won one of those once!
But other times…I see something more like this:
OK U GUYS! I JUST BAKED COOKIES ON THIS COOKIE SHEET THAT’S SO AWESOME! U WANT ONE TOO BECAUSE U THINK I AM AWESOME SO I WILL GIVE YOU ONE!
Followed by 1000 comments that say things like:
OMG U R SO BEAUTIFUL AND UR FOOD IS SO YUMMY, PLEASE GIVE ME THAT 5 DOLLAR COOKIE PAN SO I CAN BE WONDERFUL LIKE YOU!
It strikes me as a bit…tacky? Annoying? Tacky and annoying? Materialistic?
Well.
You’ll find NONE OF THAT HERE, FRIENDS.
Instead, I’m going to take a hint from Marie and do something a bit different.
I have organized a BLOGGER GIVEAWAY.
Where you are competing to win stuff PEOPLE ARE GIVING AWAY.
Here is how it works:
One entry if you:
1. Comment on this post and tell me why you WANT TO WIN!!!!
2. Tweet “ZOMGZ AR IS HAVING A GIVEAWAY!” Make sure you cc @theangryrunner so I give you credit. (Note: I am way behind in follow requests so feel free to bug me if I don’t follow you.)
3. Link to it on your blog.
Bonus entries if:
1. Your “why I want to win” answer is awesome.
2. If you tweet “ZOMGZ ANGRY RUNNER FUCKED YOUR DAD WHILE MY MOM WATCHED! ALSO, A GIVEAWAY!” Again, make sure I am cc’d in.
3. Predict how many stoli and cokes I will consume after the Boston Marathon next week.
What are you competing for?
Why, I’m so glad you asked.
First: Jenna’s lovely barf scarf and Kate’s calender. Note that JENNA MADE THIS SCARF JUST FOR THE GIVEAWAY WINNER!
Second:
Third: 
Fourth: This Dog toy from Tracy!
Fifth: This lovely shirt from Kristan: (Men’s large!)
Sixth: An Easter bunny table runner from Amy!
Seventh: Julie has donated one pass (for two people) to Ripley’s Odditorium!
Eighth: From Shelby :
“Do you struggle because ALL of your friends are wearing tiaras in the race and YOU just want to be DIFFERENT?
Showcase your UNIQUE personality with these plush cat ears! Lightweight and comfortable with a soft elastic chin strap to keep things securely in place while running and also while craning your neck around to take pictures of yourself on the course. Will not interfere with iPod or Camelback operation.”
AND THAT’S NOT ALL:
From me? You will get something so awesome it deserves it’s own post. Which you will see next week when the grand prize winner is revealed. It will be packaged with a pack of Maverick cigarettes from my friend at Performance Production as a tribute to, well, you fill in the blank.
AND THAT’S STILL NOT ALL:
Do you have something to contribute? TELL ME! You’ll even get a bonus entry into the contest!
*If you give something away AND you win the grand prize? Your item will go to the runner up. See, everyone wins!
This contest is open until Tuesday, April 19th at 11:59 PM EST.
The winner will be notified on the blog by Wednesday. You’ll give me your address or PO box and then it will soon be filled with packages from your bloggy/tweety friends all over the US of A!*
*Limited to US residents. Sorry, Canadian and overseas friends. I still love you.
Trackbacks
- WOW! PUNCH THE MONKEY AND WIN A GREAT BIG-ASS HUGE MASSIVE GRAND MEGAPRIZE! « Dr. Joan Bushwell's Chimpanzee Refuge
- Nurture and nature | eat, drink, run
- The most awful blog giveaway ever. | summerslowrunner
- If you are GOING TO BE IN BOSTON THIS WEEKEND «
- Angry Runner’s Giveaway | AE513 The Blog
- To: The Angry Runner. From: DC the Cat. | AE513 The Blog
- Keep those entries coming… «
- Boston Envy | The Adventures of GeekGirl
- If you ain’t running game say my name « My Running Shorts
- in which I take back everything bad I ever said about the treadmill « Cheaper Than Therapy
- Nurture and nature | eat, drink, and run
I am so blessed to be privy to the SECRET PRIZE! Heh heh heh… You guys NEED to enter because it makes it all worthwhile. Trust me.
Am I disqualified because I’m contributing to the giveaway??? It would be SWEET if I won my tape back!
I just edited the contest! If you win the grand prize, the tape will go to a runner up. (I could just send everything back, but it seems fair.)
WEEEEE
Can I win the car that the bunny wunny runner is photographed on?
Just the bunny, which is more valuable!
I want to win because I am having a Ted Buckland sort a day/life and winning some random ass crap that I really don’t need would kind a fit right in with how shit’s been going. I mean that fucking dog toy, utterly useless in my life . . . I have a cat, who is smaller than the frickin’ toy. But, guess what, that just makes me want the shit out of it! And Fuck Me, don’t get me started on that Easter Bunny Runner! I haven’t wanted anything that bad since my seventh grade math tutor!
“I want to win, I want to win, I want to win,
it’s a sin that I am Not a Fin
. . . .CAAAAAAAAUSSE I want to WIN!”
Yes, that is my I want to win song, which I am now going to force some small childeren to sing with me until I FUCKING WIN, Bitchez!
I think we need a video of you singing that.
Too Easy! Enjoy!
http://locker29.blogspot.com/2011/04/for-my-angry-little-compatriot.html
The reasons I deserve to win whatever you’re peddling here — and I don’t even care what the prize is because I just want to keep others from the satisfaction of being recognized for achieving something nominally positive — are far too many to describe, but I’ll summarize. For one thing, I’ve had a higher blood-alcohol content than you could ever dream of — while walking and talking, no less. For another, you showed remarkable restraint in not posting the nude pictures I sent you while in the throes of one of those fucking world-class booze-benders, and on this basis I can only assume that you like me more than other people do and thus set up this content with the covert intention to award me the win anyway — the Internet counterpart to pork-barrel politics. For yet another, I’m not like the other assholes who take all day to get to the point about their greatness and what their qualifications for first place supposedly are; I’m as succinct as those waterheads are tiresome. For yet another, I don’t rely on profanity to make a point. For still yet another, I’ll build you the best Wikipedia entry in history if I win and take a snapshot before it’s quickly deleted by tasteless bitchfuckers. For yet still yet another, well…there’s a sealed envelope somewhere that more or less assures the outcome of this, and I just wanted to let others here know not to waste time trying to impress you. They might, at that, but they’re still losers.
Thanks for your consideration of me as a candidate and for all of your support in an admittedly trying time. I hope to hear from you promptly so that we may discuss this opportunity further and punch each other in the face.
You just really want those cat ears, don’t you?
And if I gave away cookies or anything else edible, including underwear, I would lace it generously with psychedelics. Not giving you any ideas or anything.
HEY. I made cookies and took pictures of them because THEY WERE DELICIOUS. the fact that I am also awesome is just a coincidence. So there.
I’d be happy to contribute a cookie to the giveaway, but fear I will eat them all first.
Or you could just give me a cookie, because I’ll eat it. (And they look awesome!)
I’m crawling out of my death bed to say this contest is awesome!
Now I know why my expired pain relief patches were rejected. International borders.
I realized that there would be a whole lot of customs for this shit and the US Postal Service likes to lose things en route to Canada. It’s our border people, not yours. BLAST.
I’ll accept personal delivery of the grand prize in Boston.
Oh, can do.
I’m really hoping that out of all the times I’ve entered blog giveaways hoping to win that I DON’T win this one. Watch me get picked. Oh God please NO. I really just wanted to comment and tell you how awesome you are. So yeah. You are awesome.
hahahaaaaaaaaaaaa. Thank you shelby for directing her readers to this post (and this blog). I have little desire to own any of those items, although I will take the dog behind the chewed up toy.
Anyway I enjoy the sentiment. Everyone is making fun of blogger cliche’s these days, and even though it usually makes me cringe with recognition from my own blog, it also makes me laugh. fucking stupid free cookies….
As discussed earlier on twitter, I don’t really want all of this random shit…BUT, I do feel like I kind of need the barf scarf to complete my life, so this is me doing all I can to make my dreams come true: I should win this horrible giveaway because of my #bleachedasshole.
I think I’ve made my point.
Also, I predict 11 stoli and cokes following Boston / I tweeted / I linked from my blog (you got your very own post, zomg!) http://summerslowrunner.wordpress.com/2011/04/13/the-most-awful-blog-giveaway-ever/
The reason I deserve to win is that I DO just need to be different and unique while running races. My all pink running skirt, tiaras, and feather boas are just too common in races these days. And it is still too far away from my wedding to wear my all white running dress and veil because ZOMG I’m getting married and need all the attention I can get and it is all about ME! However I think I can fashion the Easter runner into a cape to wear across my back. It will bring a springtime seasonal touch to my race day apparel.
HAhaha omg amazing Kristan!! I just KNOW you were wearing that shirt at a frat party when it was plain white and all the attendees had different colored paint.
You’re getting married at Disney World, aren’t you??
http://www.disneyweddingblog.com/2010/05/wedding-spotlight-brettainy-kyle.html
LEAVE BRETTAINY ALONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
WIN
Except instead of a Pumpkin she’s going to be riding up to her wedding in a carriage shaped like skull and encrusted with rhinestones as part of the WWNC (what would Nic Cage do?) theme.
How did you know it was both at Disney World and in my Nic Cage scull carriage? I plan on wasting all of my money on it and declaring bankruptcy soon after.
I don’t really want anything either….but if I had to pick one of these completely awful prizes, I would go for eighth place. Why? Because I’m a crazy cat lady, plain and simple. I could become “one” with my cat if I had those ears. I could wear them in all of my road races and enter my name as “DC Eagleman” so that technically my cat is the one running the race. I think that’s justification enough for why I deserve those cat ears!!!
I don’t want any of that stuff either….but if you wear the cat ears on Monday, I’ll hand you a vodka and coke around Mile 19. (Don’t worry, it’ll be made with organic vanilla beans from the local CSA because I know you only drink AWESOMENESS to fuel your inner beatitude.)
PS If I do win, I may just resurrect my old half-assed food blog and open a Twitter account to celebrate #winning.
I WANT THOSE CAT EARS.
I predict you will black out and therefore not remember how many Stoli and cokes you have after the Boston Marathon <3 <3 <3
I should win because I have never had Maverick cigarettes.
I think instead of Angry Runner T-shirts for your readers, you should start a store and sell cat ears with a logo for use in future races. The prototype can be Shelby’s cat ears for they do not interfere with iPod or Camelback function. That’s a great start right there.
And i do believe you have outdone yourself on this contest. I really don’t want any of this crap but feel the need to comment on this to show my awesome of awesomeness. Wish there were a better reason for not winning but I suppose that’ll have to do for now.
When you said a “blogger giveaway”, I thought you meant you were giving aways a blogger. I could use one; my blog has sat idle far too long. A blogger could blog for me at my blog. Whatever.
I do like the cat ears; ‘specially since they don’t interfere with Camelbaks. They are EPIC — or is it awesome-sauce? Love the little tuft of fur on top. Speaking of cats, if mine offers one up in time, I have a hairball to add to the pot.
Anyway, if *I* win, I’d rather not be notified via your blog. I’d prefer to be notified via a sticky-note placed on a mirror here in the bathroom at work, so I can have a beautiful day and wish my co-workers happiness and unicorns.
OH SNAP.
Loves.
I would like to win the bunny runner so I can fashion it into a fancy top and then post my outfit on my new fashion blog!
I realized I blogged about this but never commented here. CONSIDER THIS MY OFFICIAL ENTRY!
Stoli + Cokes? At least 12. And a shot of Jaeger.